In this story, we mentioned race because it was ABOUT race, kwim?

The girl in your post was clearly wrong and I can’t argue against that-but I know plenty of stories of “white” people acting an ass as well. Black people are not alone in having dumb asses in their race, trust me, and if I told you some of those stories, I’m pretty sure that I would never mention the person’s race because it doesn’t matter. In Fact, your story would have been funnier had you left that part out completely.

What Nina said. I think she was probably confusing the concepts of the words “racist” and “discriminatory.”

I’m coming over from MyBrownBaby, a blog that talks about motherhood but filtered through a distinctly Moms of Color lens. Today I ran a post asking my audience who’s in their blog “tribe,” and inviting them to check out a few of my favorite sites. The blog was inspired by a question I asked during a panel at BlogHer 09, about divisiveness and segregation on the internet. Teresha left a comment for me at MyBrownBaby telling me about the ongoing discussion here, and I came over to check it out.

I have to tell you that I make a point of visiting blogs that are interesting, well written, thought-provoking and smart; we don’t have to agree on everything, but what I do want is some sort of connection—and an acknowledgment that even though we may not agree on everything, at the most basic level, we are human and way more alike than different.

Still, I also want to know that you give a darn about my circumstances, that you can see my point of view—or at least that you care about it. If this is not readily apparent on the blogs I choose to visit, I’m not really going to come back.

To that end, I think Teresha has a point. If I’m a mom of color making my first visit here, I’m going to be a little taken aback by the fact that the only two posts that seem to speak directly to race are kinda calling black women out. Granted, the idiot in the shoe store was a fool and deserved to be called out, but in the context of posts that specifically mention race, these are the only two you have. A casual observer who is a mom of color might assume from reading those two posts that this isn’t the most comfortable place for her to spend her time.

That’s not to say that you have become all Malcolm X in order to attract black moms to your site. But sites that really take the time to get the diversity thing right will likely attract moms of color who will keep coming back for more. How do they do this? By including pictures of moms of color in their illustrations. Occasionally featuring products that are specifically for moms of color (make-up colors, hair products, products made specifically by moms of color or that foster diversity—for everyone). By having a diverse staff of writers. By writing posts that give firm opinions on incidents that are colored by race (commenting on that Philadelphia pool incident would have been a good way to show you’re paying attention to the issues we’re following and have something constructive to say about them).

Basically, if you want moms of color to come, you have to show that you actually want them there. And that won’t happen just by questioning where all the black moms are.

But you know what? I like this site. And I’m going to make a point of visiting and commenting and participating, simply because you bothered to ask me to. In my book, that’s a great start. See you around!

Anyway, I wear a size 10….I rarely find anything in my size or if I do, it’s rarely cute.

I’m white. Does that mean, by this young woman’s thinking, that shoe companies/department stores are racist against the SIZE of our feet or the color of our feet?

I am confused. Who knew my poor giant feet were being discriminated against.

(i don’t care if you’re purple with pink polka dots, you can’t hide stupid)

My goal isn’t to stop you from talking about race or your experiences that happen to involve race. No one should be offended if you discuss a real life encounter. All I am asking is that you think about how it might be interpreted. If you see nothing weird, then okay. really. I’m okay if you gave it some thought and reached that conclusion. And, heck girl, I’m not going anywhere!

p.s. I don’t believe in coincidences. Everything happens for a reason, whether we see it or not. For example, your two posts got me out of hiding and engaged on MomDot!

I would think that mentioning race at all shouldnt be something that we should bar at all…it should be openly talked about without offense unless I was doing something extremely offensive. I think that someone in the other post pointed out that my sentiments were actually shared by another blogger recently, so I am not the only one that took notice. I am just probably one of the few that mention it.

Nonetheless, even if something comes up 45 times in a row and I want to blog it, I hope I can blog without fear of being ostracized or something “wierd” is going on.

While the situations have ‘race’ in common, they are separate subjects entirely…one simply based on an observation and one based on an experience.

There is really nothing more to it than that.

Trisha. I was not offended by your post about the Black girl and her silly comment about the shoes being racist. For the record, if I were there I would have given her a crazy look too. I might have even pulled her aside and tell her she was wrong for making such an outlandish statement and explain to her that it only serves to diminish credibility when real racism occurs.

You are right, it’s your blog. You can post what you want. But you asked where all the black women were on this site and, as one, I am pointing out that your last two posts about black females have been 1: to question why we self-segregate and 2: to ridicule one for her inability to express frustration over a lack of options for her big feet without pulling the race card.

It just comes across weird, no? I’m just trying to get you to walk in our shoes (no pun intended) and see things from the other side.

Please believe that I am not upset at you, just wanting to get a real convo going. So, don’t take what I’ve said as a personal attack. I consider you a worthy adversary in verbal sparring match…fiercely opinionated, vocal and smart. Keep it coming. we might just crack this nut.

If someone is offended because OF the girls race, then that is just plain ignorant. However, since this woman was complaining ABOUT race, it was relevant to add her race into the story. If a white or hispanic or asian woman was doing the same thing, I would be reporting the same scenario because it was outrageous.

I am not a news reporter talking about current events or political standpoints. I hardly ever touch on celebrity news, iraq, afghanistan and that stupid health care reform bill I don’t agree with.

If i had been AT the pool and had an opinion of some boys being kicked out, I would be posting it but if you are suggesting I should have a “race” balance on my blog because I posted an experience, I would consider that part of the problem, not the solution.