I know we have discussed this before as bloggers, but recently someone was sharing this article in Fashion Incubator and I feel that its outlandish and slightly stuck up. I am absolutely FED UP with designers and small businesses acting like they are the queen B of whatever they do and as bloggers we are inconveniencing them by advertising them. If your answer is no, then its no, I’m not begging you, I’m giving you an opportunity and you can take it or you can leave it.
PSA ANNOUNCEMENT: I don’t run a website to advertise your business for free. I am so completely sick of people thinking that bloggers are just trying to use someone for products and that they do all the work and we do nothing at all. Your product is special to YOU, it doesn’t hold a special place in my heart that I get a hard on to write about it for 2 hours of my life FOR someone I have never met on a product I have never seen. Sure, there are some products I would love to try, but trust me, nothing I write is “free”, it takes a lot of time and my time is worth about $60 an hour. How about as bloggers if we all collectively just asked for $100 to talk about companies on our sites and then, instead of ‘samples’, you can send us advertising dollars. That would actually work better for me anyway.
I can’t believe a site that puts out information to the masses would publish something like this when it should be encouraging its designers to find ways to bring their designs to light. And no, I am not a design blog and unless its child related, you will rarely find me mentioning fashion, but holding out for the “big bloggers” to talk about your stuff may mean that you will spend quite a bit of time being unknown.
Is it me or have people with products gone haywire with narcissism. My life doesn’t stop over a pair of shoes-no matter WHAT price tag you put on them.
But what really gets me, after I took the time to go to that site and read it, basically wasting 1.5 minutes of my life, I realized I had already written my feelings on this under another post here therefore I put that opinion up and they EDIT MY RESPONSE where its displayed in a way that makes me look uninformed and I get this email:
You are welcome to disagree but direct attacks are unwelcome. As far as the matter of ignorance is concerned, you failed to address the specificity of the issue of samples -among other matters. While you may be a “successful” wahm hairbow maker, I didn’t last 25+ years in this business being “ignorant” and would suggest it is not within the parameters of your experience to make such an assertion.
Similarly, it was inappropriate for you to post verbatim your previous entry much of which covered old ground when a summary and a link would have sufficed. Publishing duplicate content across websites devalues one’s page ranking and as mine is PR6 and with over 200,000 visitors monthly so I’d like to keep it that way.
I have amended your entry deleting the duplicate content and added a link to your post.”
Is it me or is this the most condescending self absorbed email you have ever seen. Direct attacks? Um, my opinion differing from theirs is not a direct attack. It may not be their opinion and I suppose you can call that an attack if your not on the other side. This email I received is an attack. But this article is hardly an attack, its educational. And how dare she say its inappropriate to post my other words from here. They are MINE, I wrote them, they are perfectly articulated to my feelings and why would I rewrite the same thing over again? My bad I had to bring my cat to the vet to talk about putting her down this morning. Ill try to work harder to create a new post with the same points just for them. They know that they won’t lose page rank over my opinion being in the comments. Covering “OLD” Ground? If it was such old news, why are they writing about it? I am assuming they have read my blog before because its certainly a valid response to many of the points they put out and I would not assume their readers have read my opinion.
Are they screening all the comments for duplicate thoughts out of all their visitors? Dude. I think she just didn’t like what I had to say. I love how she tries to point out that she has a page rank 6 on the site and her visitors monthly to me. Was that her way to say “know your roll”? Is this where I apologize and say I’m sorry I’m just a lowly old mommy blogger?
I think they should have a little more responsibility in putting out 2 sides of the story for the designers they are trying to “help” and if they are going to post something controversial, expect some hard realities and other opinions and let them be known. For the record, I tried to post the link to my site first, but it kept telling me it was under a “Wp-Spam” and would not go through, so instead I added some things onto the previous post I wrote and used that as my response.
Oh, and I apologize that my online business is not GOOD enough to have an experience with blogging and SEO and the “success” of mine you put in quotations. It doesn’t matter what I create from home, this is the “support” they bring from their network? Got it….WAHM and Mom Designers are not actual designers.
If I made dresses I would have more credibility?
Pathetic.
Oh, and correction Kathy…you only have 199,999 visitors now.
~Trisha
I am thinking back to the video Vlog that you posted once on here about some mommy bloggers can be bitches. For some reason, this person that sent you that email sticks to my mind in that regards. Wow. I cannot get over this email. Shocking.
Cat @ 3KidsandUs wrote:
That’s exactly why I didn’t either. I thought Trisha’s response was well said though and there was no reason for it to be removed. I’m always amazed at the ignorance of people.
Why don’t we just boycott that site? That ought to teach her a lesson!
I, too, am sick to death of being called “just a mommy blogger”. This is, in a way, my business, NOT a hobby. I love to write. I have since I was a child. Now I am essentially self-publishing my writing. I love it. I have recently been asked to write for an online humor magazine AND had a company come to me to review their product (completely unsolicited). So, guess what? Mommy Bloggers have some power, whether this elitist idiot wants to believe it or not!
That email was not only a weak attempt at saying she is the HBIC, but to let you know, in no uncertain terms, that “your/our kind” is not welcome there. The truly sad thing is that she is NOT the HBIC, YOU are, along with 5 min. for Mom and SITS. (OK, that is just my opinion, but I think it’s true. =P)
Sites and people like that do not deserve our time or bandwith. As I said before, let’s just boycott her sorry, elitist ass! (Sorry if that was too much, Trisha)
It seems that over and over small “professionals” want to attack bloggers and what they have to offer. Usually it seems because of one bad experience with a blogger. There are millions of blogs out there, and a “professional” would know to research the blog to maximize their exposure. So, if they are willing to do a little work, it could lead to a huge benefit.
Instead of blaming bloggers for this or that, maybe they should just suck it up and realize that they failed to do their own research. With anything out there, there will be a few who don’t follow through on promises etc, but that doesn’t mean every single one is bad. Like say, I had a business that failed to meet my expectations, does it mean I’ll stop shopping forever? No. Same with blogs. One doesn’t have what I want, I move on to one of the other 2.6 million.
And seriously, could that e-mail have been a little more condescending?
that was a really mean email…just mean!
You know. Dyson, Crayola, Boon – all of those sponsors for you girls going to Blogher – they realize the value of bloggers. If some people miss the boat, oh well. We are definitely more influential then they think.
That post over there wasn’t even worth my time commenting on.
Sometimes Trisha….you just have to say…WHATEVER!!!!
That was crazy! Just keep on keepin on! People are always going to get on our nerves. I wouldn’t let her whacko response bug me.
She’s obviously got a beef.
I read your entire post. If that was an attack, I’d love to see how she reacts when someone is just out and out ripping her to shreds, instead of clearly, concisely and calmly stating their talking points.
Ugh. I won’t go there.
this is the same site that was all for “saving handmade” and all that, right?? The CPSIA issues…??
anyway, being that I am a designer of children’s clothing and a seamstress and a blogger…I “get” where everyone is coming from. I was taken advantage of by a few bloggers when I first started–they wooed me with their stats, etc. and it was sadly not as helpful as I thought it would be BUT that was MY BAD because I didn’t ask the right questions.
No one can blame anyone else for their mistakes–if you get burned that is on you–sorry. In business you HAVE TO look out for yourself in real life as well as online…and if not you live and learn and go on…you don’t bash the entire mommy blogsphere.
I think one way to tell if a blogger is reputable is to look through their site and see what companies they have worked with. Do they do an honest and thorough review, or is it just a quick blurb from the company’s site?
Read more: “Mom Blogs at MomDot » I am so sick of bloggers being bashed. Sick. Of. It.” – http://www.momdot.com/i-am-so-sick-of-bloggers-being-bashed-sick-of-it/#ixzz08iR8sVQv
I think it’s easy for certain types of people to do that kind of research, but when you think about a typical designer, they are very into their product development and work, wearing so many hats to keep their company afloat and growing, and often don’t have the resources or the know how to perform that kind of research.
Small designers often get taken (advantage of) by a lot of people when venturing into online areas, from graphic designers/ web developers, to “seo specialists”. Even companies with some size and decent levels of manufacturing have this problem. This is not to point the finger at you, but just to say that there are shark infested waters and what seems like simple research to one, is overwhelming and confusing to another. As such a lot of people in the industry retreat into the safety of print because it’s a better known, and longer established arena.
You’re right, it would be nearly impossible to establish a seal and have a body that governs it, but clear statements of ethics on a blog would allow companies, and PR firms, to have some resource for quickly gauging the credibility of one blog vs another. There are only so many times any person can deal with “gimme gimme gimme” before they become desensitized to the group and start painting people with wide brushes.
And trust me, I know that large companies are into blogging, but they also have different ways of determining budget and ROI on PR, whereas smaller companies don’t have that leeway and have resources (product and time/ human resources) that are much more limited.
@ Miracle:
I think it would be nice to have kind of a blogger approval seal, but who would be in charge of assigning those? I think one way to tell if a blogger is reputable is to look through their site and see what companies they have worked with. Do they do an honest and thorough review, or is it just a quick blurb from the company’s site?
If you find a blog and have a good relationship with them, and want to work with other blogs, why not ask the first one for recommendations of other bloggers who could help. It’s like most things in life- you go there because of a recommendation, or you try it for yourself to see if it’s good or not. Unfortunately, sometimes the outcome is you don’t like it. That’s just how it is in life. You can get taken by mechanics, or the food is bad at a restaurant. It’s just a part of life to deal with the bad as well as the good.
Ok, am I missing something or is that site not a BLOG. Now we have a blogger who is censoring the discussion about a valid topic which she started in an effort to inform her readers.
What is the point of that? What is the point of allowing comments if you are only going to publish those that agree with the original post?
This ‘do it my way because I’m better than you and if you don’t you’re an idiot’ take on life doesn’t provide any value to anyone.
Yuck
Miracle, it wont let me respond. When i come back, ill respond later today or tomorrow for you.
I read your etsy post, this post and the one(s) on fashion-incubator.com. I don’t know how many times that designers and publicists can point out that there is a problem and the blogging community continue to respond defensively about it.
There is a problem.
There are bad apples spoiling the entire bunch and tarnishing the image.
This is why there is “bashing” and why you’re sick of it.
What are the solutions. The solution simply isn’t “some of us are good and we do good work.” There needs to be more accountability, self-policing and standards of ethicis. This is what it really boils down to.
You are a leading authority in the mom blogging community and you really could do a lot of good by helping to address the issues that small designers and manufacturers have, setting standards and really speaking to the issue (not people’s reactions to the issue, but the issue itself).
I posted on fashion-incubator asking for your response, and I don’t know if you’ve commented and it’s awaiting moderation or not, but I really do want to hear what bloggers have to say about this. You know that there are serious and egregious freeloaders parading as bloggers, whether fashion bloggers, beauty bloggers or mom bloggers, what do you have to say about keeping a clean image and standard towards those small companies who don’t have the resources to devote to diving into this kind of research, yet need some assurance that they are not being taken advantage of when asked for product?
The one thing I want you to address, please, is in comparison to the print world, there is credibility to back up publications. So if a small designer is approached by Cookie, for example, they know what’s behind that as opposed to “Happy Kids Magazine of Fresno, CA”, that is an easier call to make. Blogs, OTOH, can look very similar, with no clear distinguishing factors. THIS is the issues small designers are dealing with.
When they have been burned, it’s a real issue and it can’t continuously be swept under the rug with “well, do your research” because a group’s reputation, as a whole, gets tarnished by the few.
Well said Trisha! Her “message” was extremely condescending and rude.
Trisha, I love you…
I left a comment on there earlier, but when I tried to politely respond to someone who responded to me, I was blocked as spam as well.
I had intended to leave a response on her article but just couldn’t bring myself to it…I didn’t have anything nice to say. And I still don’t. So I’ll just leave it as I completely agree with all of the above!
Wow…that’s sad, really, really sad.
It seems in an attempt to be “informative” to us uneducated-blogger-wanna-be-professionals, she lost her message and became condescending instead. Too bad, she could have forged good relationships rather than alienating people.