In light of the whole Dyson thing I was thinking. You know, it seems like when someone mentions housework and women together, its assumed that its some 1950s view of how a marriage or household is and that its wrong that a woman “lowers herself.” While my house is far, far from a “traditional” house, I have to say that I am PROUD, not offended, to take care of my family.
I like to make dinner (when I don’t burn it), I love to buy my family things, I enjoy cleaning and am happy when the house is clean, I LIKE being a …gasp…wife.
I don’t feel suppressed or otherwise put down by being a “stay at home mom” and I don’t feel ashamed for enjoying what my (chosen) role is in my home. In fact, I don’t really do a great job at it half the time. I get so caught up in my business and my email and all the other random life things that sometimes im a big fat failure and neglect what my household responsibilities are.
But what I cant stand is that when I am proud to be a mom, proud to be a wife, that if I like to cook and clean and enjoy caring for the people in my life, that I have to feel defensive that I DO want those things. As if its some backwards way of thinking and I must have been oppressed or grown up in a household where the man is the boss and I am “just a woman”.
I am college educated, I am very smart, I am extremely dedicated and have tons of perseverance and I most certainly don’t need anyone to take care of me, financially or otherwise.
But I LIKE it.
I WANT my husband to take care of me. I WANT him to pay the bills. I want him to take out the trash and do the cat litter. I want him to take care of the yard and the cars. I want him to open doors for me and I want him to buy me presents.
I won’t feel sad if I never achieve something greater then just being who I am right now; a wife and a mother.
And I think its the greatest role of all.
~Trisha
I agree that you should be proud of whatever role that you have chosen to pursue in life. I loved working as a teacher but hated being away from my daughter for 10-12 hours a day. So I decided to start my own business as a web designer so that I could stay home. It was also cheaper for us to do this.
However, I love being a wife but I hate housework. I love cooking but I hate cleaning the kitchen. I never clean the bathroom but I do clean the living room and our bedroom. I don’t think that makes me less of a wife. I think what gets women up in arms is when they are told that if they are working outside of the home or don’t enjoy housework then they are not doing their wifely duties.
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YEAH!!! You go girl!!! I also enjoy staying at home and taking care of my husband. I will say he does help a lot in the house. I am also tired of the double standard, if you stay home and if not then you are abandon your kids.
I am so glad someone spoke up!
Thank you!
Hugs!!!
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We should all be proud of the things we do and the people who judge and criticize like they have (by blowing something they didnt even comprehend right) just shows the insecurities they themselves have.
I’m proud to WANT to clean or so on and so on
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I think we all have to do what is right for our family! If you are fine with your responsibilities and he is fine with his, it is noone else business, IMO!
I do think purchases over a certain amount require a family decision unless you have separate accounts or your own mad money you use!!!
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Ya know, I have to agree, but I have my own reasons as well. When I was working I was constantly cursing those women that fought to get us in the workplace way back when. I HATED all the pressure to work, be a fab mom, a loving wife and a kick ass homemaker. It was way too much for me. It just didn’t fit my personality. When I started staying home I got a lot of grief from working moms I know and it was hard. It shouldn’t be like that.
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You could not have said it better!
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You know, its not evena bout being a stay at home mom, its about just being proud that you can say i LIKE being a mom, i LIKE being a wife (if you are those things) without being looked at like you have 2 heads for not being something ELSE.
I work from home, very very hard, but im a mom before i work. Most days.
you know?
trisha
I always wanted to be a SAHM. My mom stayed home, as did both of my grandma’s, and so on down the line.
In high school as everyone was going off to college people were so excited about what they were going to major in. I had such a hard time deciding because I knew that I wanted to be a mom. I did graduate from college, and then I went back later on for more schooling. But I’m proud to say that I am a SAHM, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
Well said
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Thanks for this post! I think it is good for moms to not feel guilty for ANY path they choose! It is wonderful to be proud to be a mommy! Being a mom is THE most important job anyone will EVER be given and it is so important to take that seriously
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