Since the conception of momdot, aside from having a community blog in which to spend my time and knowledge, the goal ultimately was to make money while doing something I am passionate about.
Let me repeat: Make Money doing something I am passionate about.
That does not make me ashamed. I am not ashamed to put ads on the site I work all day on. In fact, I just signed another contract. I am not ashamed to send rates to companies that want my virtual real estate. I am not ashamed to sell text links. I am not ashamed to support the family that I so proudly represent here. And I am not ashamed to tell people that don’t believe that same sentiment that they are living in some nonsensical world where my time doesn’t equal money.
I cannot tell you how completely and utterly furious it makes me to see anyone downgrade the importance of moms being able to take their websites, youtube channels, and blogs to the next level of creating a full on income from their site.
And even worse, I am consistently seeing “big” bloggers give shoddy “advice” to others that they should work for free. In fact, I heard recently a conference even touted that moms need to work free for companies in order to market themselves. If this is the advice being passed out at conferences, I’ll pass. The second corporations entered the world of mom blogging was the second it became an industry.
My blog is not your internship program.
You want me? No problem.
But let me warn you, I’m no ones bitch girl.
You can take me or leave me and its up to your company if I am the right representative for you, but the difference in me and others is I know my WORTH. I don’t sit here and get arthritis in my fingers, gain 7500 twitter followers, and sign up for every social networking site under the sun so I can spread the goodness and love of someones multimillion dollar corporation in hopes that someone else notices me.
Notices me for what? For more free advertising? Puhleese.
When was the last time you walked into Walmart and they gave you $20 in a gift card in hopes that your shopping experience is fabulous and you tell your friends about it.
If you don’t want to compensate me, hire someone in your office to be your social networking guru and I wish you luck and success and there are no hard feelings.
That should be everyone’s attitude.
You know why review blogging pisses me off so much? Not because I think moms are selling out too much (although some are) and not because content is a way of the past (even though partly it is), but because there are so many moms that have yet to figure out what their worth is.
Moms are allowing themselves to be used.
USED.
Companies are pimps and moms are the whores.
And guess what? The pimps are collecting 100% of the moola at the end of the day. Dude. Don’t whores deserve even $5 for new heels or something? And while “mom bloggers” are not technically a group that has a union and has to follow each other, nor would I ever want it to be, those that lead and stand out should realize that they have a responsibility. A responsibility to educate the companies and the bloggers and set an example. The more they accept free as a form of payment or encourage it to everyone around them, the more free will show up and everyone else hits a glass ceiling on monetary success.
And if you are new…it feels glamorous. Exciting. OMG, I got invited somewhere. They picked me. Yeah, I get it. Trust me. It’s cool when you’re on the “list”. But eventually those invites and requests and posts turn into real work- atleast if you are doing it right. And when they do, that’s the point you realize that what I am saying has a real ring of truth to it.
Do you know what happens to a company that gives everything out for free? It fails. You want to know why mom bloggers around you fail? This.
Its simply economics.
The time away from your family in traveling, or advertising, or marketing, or posting. It’s work. And its not just about the products. It’s not about the free product bartering. I’m actually in favor of some of that. It’s overall. If you haven’t taken your site and created an advertising value to it, a skill, a way to bring in some compensation, then why would you ever consider day in and day out of lowering your value to nothing?
Do you want to know how much money I made from MomDot site last year? Not products, in cash. Over $20K.
I can guarantee you that my site isn’t the most popular, has the most traffic, or has the most involvement online in social arenas. I cant even decide on a template from month to month. I hate twitter, I came to facebook late in the game, and I don’t hang out with everyone cause I don’t have time. In fact I know lots of bloggers with less traffic then I have that make as much as, or more than I do, with their blogs.
They’re non-niche parenting mom blogs. They know their worth.
And I realize $20K is chump change in the real world. I have a freaking college education and years of experience making millions of dollars for companies. I am a creative genius that refuses to spend anytime away from my child. But sitting in the privacy of my own office, hanging out with friends online, and creating content that I believe is interesting, controversial, helpful, or fun, I added a supplemental income to my families household because I came up with a plan and put it into action.
And my blog isn’t quite 2 years old yet.
Make no mistake here; that’s not a brag. That’s me telling you to stop selling yourself short and to stop letting other bloggers , “big bloggers”, tell you that you have to gain traction by working your butt off for free.
What you have to do is set some goals, put something unique together, get an audience, become a personality or presence, and make it happen. Not everyone will make it happen. Not everyone will make $1000 a month or even $100 a month. But I can assure you that your income will always be $0 if you keep taking on every little thing that comes your way because someone dangled a carrot in front of you, and 400 other bloggers, faces in hopes for some futuristic deal that may never present itself.
Do you know what I do when someone turns down my negotiation? I delete the email and move on. I don’t lose one bit of sleep over it. It’s not my loss, it’s their loss. Its one less thing I have to do in the morning. I put my energy into something that makes me money or makes me happy.
And you know, I do work with some companies for no cash-money compensation. I’m not saying if someone doesn’t pay you, totally move on. There are exceptions to every rule. I’ll help out friends who ask for my help, I do it for companies I really really love, I try to help out mompreneurs consistently, and I barter for someone if it has some benefit to my family like a trip or a household item I need or want.
Again, I know my worth.
Sometimes that worth really is the product barter! But it took me some deep involvement in the blogosphere for the past year to realize what others were saying before me. There is far too much undervaluing going on every day around us. And the sad part is, the goals women have online don’t match the perception they are giving.
Do you know what companies see when you work for free? That your worth is free. That the amount of effort you are giving out and the value you have assigned to that work is zero.
And you know, I don’t blame companies one damn bit. I don’t. Cause if I had a company, I would absolutely be using the lowest bidder with the largest audience. That, my dear, is us. We are the lowest bidder with the largest collective audience on the web. Where is all this free advertising going for companies? How much overhead is being saved? It’s not reflecting in my grocery bill, I can tell you that.
If you are a leader in this community, if people look up to you, start doing everyone a favor and support the collective goals around you by pushing them forward, not holding them back. There is no magic number. There is no “you have been a blogger for 4 years and NOW you can make money”. Could you imagine what it would be like if we turned our selves into more of a united front?
This is capitalism.
It’s day one, baby.
~Trisha
Thanks Trisha for the reminder of our worth.
Excellent Post.
thank you for this. this is exactly the kind of pep talk i need.
I don’t know much about the whole review blogger thing, but I did kind of wonder how it worked and if there was any compensation other than getting the “stuff” to review. Definitely does not seem like it make a whole lot of sense to spend “free” time working for FREE (unless you really find it to be fun). Better to spend that time writing something truly useful, instructive or inspirational!
Trisha,
Your post should be mandatory reading for mommy bloggers who don’t value themselves as much as they should. Brands should be educated by reading your post too, both the new ones just getting into social media who have been to start pitching us mommy bloggers and the consumer social media strategists who are already trying to get our valued opinions for just a song and a dance even though they should know better.
The various mom blogging communities, such as SheBlogs.org, BlogHer, and TwitterMoms.com are already making some headway in this area, but we’ve got a long road ahead of us to educate brands and social media experts on why they need to start taking mommy opinions and our control over consumer spending a lot more seriously.
ah-frickin’men!
Trisha I have always found you to be very giving of yourself and you support so many companies and don’t ask for much in return you should get paid for what you do! On another note I have found some bloggers are going the other extreme and charging excessive ad rates, one wanted $400 to do a text link of my product there is a fine line between reasonable and excessive and you are not excessive.
you happen to be one of those mom businesses I support and love. Your kind of business are the ones we should be bartering with…not with Chevy..you know?
And yes, $400 is just stupid. LOL!
Today I sent out my ad prices to a few people who requested them and before I hit the “send” button, I questioned myself as to whether or not I was worth my prices. And my prices are LOW to begin with, comparatively speaking.
I absolutely needed to read this today.
Thank you.
Let’s send this to all PR reps. There are some really good ones out there, and some terrible one that blast and “available for immediate post” crapola. I just delete them.
Thanks for telling me I have value…now to figure out how to tell people that.
Another challenge, is the fact that I DO work outside of the home so I can’t devote the time others do.
I KNOW something specific set you off and gave you the steam to shout all that out there. Don’t need to know what it was, but I KNOW there was “one more” of it than you were going to smile and tolerate. Glad you did share it. There are many of us who feel we need to get some experience under our belts,(or elastic waistbands,) prove our writing and our following, but who decides when we are proven? Why do we feel that we should not be compensated during our learning period? If I went to work for a company, even though I did not know all there was to know immediately upon beginning a job, I would still expect a paycheck at the end of the week. I may not expect CEO pay, but I would expect something appropriate for my time and effort.
Perks like free product are nice, but they do not put food on the table and clothes on the kids continually. A regular income from blogging is the dream. Dreams become goals when one puts a plan in place and takes action. Action brings results and compensation.
I am with you all the way. I opened up my website 5 years back, and now want to open a Blog. Needing a bit of help on that as I want mine to look good, kind of ‘cute’ and am a bit lost on starting it up.
I’m happy to swap some ads for some direction on doing a decent job of this. Money is at at a low right now, due to having had heart surgery this past year. My website has 50,000 subs, and currently I send to 10,000 on a regular time. I also have Twitter, Face Book, and the largest Yahoo group that features Freebies/Sweeps that ‘allow’ others to post. But it’s been slow due to my health.
Anyone interested in a swap for some help in decorating a blog?
Hoping for a reply.
Thanks
Char Hess
http://www.thefreebiecafe.com
http://www.forherandnow.com
Hi Charlotte,
I have shared a ton of information on the best way to get an SEO and plugin optimized WordPress blog installed in the post I linked to this comment. Derek would probably be willing to collaborate with you to get your site going.
Another reason why I love you. We SHOULD get paid for our hard work and that’s what it is. WORK. Not a hobby and we don’t want to post about you “just because”. I want something from it. PERIOD> BTW LOVE the line “Companies are pimps and we are the whores” lol
Kas
You keep drawing me back over here today Trisha! You definitely point to some lessons learned and some I still need to …
I’d said thanks for your 2 cents, but I have a feeling the going rate is far higher. lol
BRAVO! BRAVO!!!
Absofreakinlutley! I may not be worth a million dollars but I sure and worth something. My time is money just like everyone else,I may not be able to command a ton of mula but I will not work for free! That is unless its a charity I believe in or like you said it has something of value to myself or my family!
Trisha,
I LOVE this post! Very powerful and well written. I have a lot to still learn. Thank you for this!
Excellent Post. You are an inspiration! Peace
Yee-freaking-haw.
I’m with you, Trisha. Start the revolution!
This is one of the most passionate posts I’ve seen you write & I agree totally. Helen Reddy would be proud. I’m a feminist and we baby boomer mommas have been fighting this same battle albeit in different scenarios not so techie since I came of age in the 70s. I started my blog to supplement my income when I retire. I make Very Good money now, am college educated & know how to construct a sentence. I do not & will not work for free unless I truly support a cause. Young women need to be continually reminded Your Time Is Valuable -whether you area WAHM or SAHM. Thanks for giving everyone another wake-up call Trisha. Stumbled.
Thank you Cindi for sharing this link with me. I totally concur that bloggers must learn to ask for what they deserve. As you know I recommend that each of them add prominent tabs or links to a page that lays out what they have to offer and what you charge.
Most people think being flexible is best but I guarantee it is better to simplify what you offer so that only two yes/no decisions are necessary:
1) Am I interested in this service? Y/N
2) Am I willing to spend this specific amount of money for it? Y/N
Anyone that wants something different will contact you to negotiate. By laying this out you make it clear what you do and whether they can afford your services.
Then use my post about Building Traffic to determine who your target audience is, how they would search for you, and how to make sure they find you.
Any blogger interested in collaborating with Cindi, myself and many others – some of whom you already know should let one of know. We have a private forum where we discuss strategies, anchor text, and supporting each other’s efforts.
I also hope you’ll consider participating in my BizLuv MEME to benefit your sites, your favorite small and online businesses and favorite causes. All bloggers participating are assured of incoming links with optimum anchor text from multiple sites.
this is perfect. here’s hoping every company that wants to work with bloggers reads this…
i am nobody’s whore… okay, well maybe my husband’s, but THAT’S it!!!
xoxo
Jeri
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I agree with this 100 percent!
What really gets me, is you KNOW these companies don’t have the balls to go to a traditional form of media like newspapers, magazines, or radio, and say “Hey, would you mind throwing this out there for me? Thanks a bunch!” and still misspell half the words in their pitch.
The pitches that really piss me off are the ones where the company just wants you to write a post rehashing their press release about a product, or promote their sale or discount code. I’ll do a review for in exchange for a free product if it’s of value to me. I’ll host a giveaway for a product if I think it will be of interest to my readers, and draw traffic. But I’m not wasting hours writing advertorials for free, then giving them free space on my blog.
Very well said even if I am guilty of some of it
I have lived & learned
Hi Tricia,
I love your honesty and fire!
I started my blog for the exact same reason, to make some money while working from home and caring for my daughter. I truly appreciate that you have disclosed the amount of money that you made last year from blogging. Suze Orman once said that women need to talk about how much they make openly and I totally agree her. I think once it’s out in the open women will be able to better negotiate what they are truly worth! Until then women will continue to under-value the services and products that they are providing.
My blog is not your internship program.
Nail on the head.
People are afraid. There will always be SOMEONE willing to do the job for less (aka free) and they are afraid of not being offered anything anymore. But why in the blogosphere is it assumed that our time has no value? But if you don’t stand up and demand and insist on your own personal worth, no one is going to do it for you.
Some things are worth bartering for, the problem is that a lot of it is not.
I used to make almost $30/hr in my professional career. I CHOSE to stay home with my kids and DECIDED awhile back that any time away from my kids has to be worth it. For my own mental health, for our finances, whatever. I determined how much my own time is worth and make my decisions based upon that. If I never hear from another PR rep again, I can live with that.
People shouldn’t let the AMOUNT of PR opportunities they receive be the gauge for how important they think they are. Because if that’s the case…then mom bloggers really are a sad, sad group.
Well put. Don’t whores get $5 for new heels or something? lol nice.
Thank you so much for posting this! I have no problem throwing up the occasional post for a company that I like. But when I’m getting three e-mails in one day from the same rep about posting something, a rep wanting me to ship to giveaway winners, etc. I’m sorry but NO. I work my ass off to blog but no way in hell am I going to keep undermining myself. Does their paycheck have a big fat zero on it? I don’t think so.
Amen Trisha! Well said.