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…is now just a smoldering pile of ash.
On Friday Night Live this past Friday Trisha and I talked about bloggy burnout. A number of things were touched upon, in big part self-imposed pressure and guilt, but I really believe that we made some progress in establishing why a mommy blogger, and particularly THIS mommy blogger was ready to pack it all in, close up shop and go bag groceries at the supermarket. Heck, it pays more.
When I first started blogging a little over a year ago, I actually enjoyed it. I would often wake up in the middle of the night and be excited over a post idea that popped into my head. I was interesting and funny and there was a passion in my “voice” when I wrote.
Now, hundreds of product reviews later, it has become a chore. My 3-a-day posts have turned to barely every other day and even those are contrived at best. Don’t get me wrong, I like reviewing products. I like discovering great new things for my kids and quite frankly I like UPS showing up every other day with free stuff.
But at what cost?
And it has nothing to do with my integrity, that is unwavering. But my passion and my heart, the thing that woke me up in the middle of the night with excitement over my next post has turned into something that still keeps me up at night, but not from excitement. From stress. The pressure to meet my commitments. The drive to provide thorough reviews up to my standards for my sponsors when there just aren’t enough hours in the day. Throw in the stress of daily life and yes, I thought about closing my blog forever.
But on Friday I realized that the blog is not the problem. I am the problem. My greed. My desire to have as much “stuff” as I can, get the next great review, and keep up with or even “one-up” the Joneses. I got caught up in the hype and the hype sucked the life out of me.
I appreciate all the companies and the PR reps who have reached out to me and I am thankful for their trust and their support, but I am walking away. I joked the other day that if it ain’t a car, a computer or major electronics, that I will not be doing reviews and as much as I laughed, it’s pretty much true. It is going to take something REALLY shiny to get my attention from now on. Or something green. Green and with the face of a former President.
Dooce said something interesting in her Good Morning America interview (along with some frustrating things as well) and it is something Trisha has been saying to us all along. That we have to realize the VALUE in the advertising we are providing for these companies, because that’s what we are doing – advertising for them. We’re not Consumer Reports providing objective opinions about products. We are like celebrities being sent a free pair of shoes for their kids. We are virtual billboards, where the presence of the product on our sites is a tesimonial – only we underestimate our worth and the value of our time and are willing to accept that pair of shoes in exchange for a couple hours worth of our time writing about it.
So if PR wants to find me, I’ll still be at the same place. Only, I won’t be responding to pitches unless they knock my socks off (and my socks are being held on with suspenders). If they want to share their client’s products with my readers, they can purchase an advertisement at a competitive rate or post a press release for a fee. I may consider running a giveaway every month, but that too must be something outstanding that knocks the suspenders off my reader’s socks.
I need to step back and find myself. I need to clear all the boxes and bagged air off my kitchen table and just get back to being a mommy blogger and more importantly a mom. All the real clutter has clouded my brain and has muted my life in a way that I am no longer comfortable with. I want to be in awe over the way my daughter say “ma-ma” and the way she crashes into a wall just to make me laugh, and I want THAT to be the most important thing I have to write about in a day.
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Great post Kim! You said everything that I have been feeling lately.
So that is what I’ve been feeling…because I am so behind on reviews right now and just wanting to throw in the towel. I have lost my focus, which when I started a year ago was writing about my life and connecting with other moms. Thanks for this insight and wish I had been listening Friday night!
Interesting post! I’m sure many other bloggers feel the exact same way right now! Very Well Said!!
I think Many Moms, myself included, are feeling this way right now.
Good for you Kim!
Kim I’m so happy for you. You’ve always been so wonderful to me and it’s nice to see you so content again.
I’m not in the whole review game and reading stuff like this makes me consider whether or not I want to get started.
Thanks for the heart felt post.
this is something I have been planning on doing as well, once all my current commitments are finished, I am stepping back- great post!
I’m so so so so happy for you Kim! Rock on Mama
Awe Kim! Woohoo! Bravo! I am with you in this journey. So far I am loving “doing my own thing” and finding my true bloggy self.
If the products went away, would I still have a cool blog? Would people come for ME? And not only for a giveaway?
I chose to find out and ya know what…they are still coming, even on non giveaway days! And it feel awesome!
Go Kim!
Rock on, Kim! This is good stuff.
Fabulously said Kim!
Great job on your first admin post, Kim! I think it takes alot of courage to really be honest with yourself and know when to cut back. I admire you!
Great post Kim! It really makes me step back and think…
Great post. Congrats to you for taking yourself back. Blogging should be about connecting with others and having fun. It should never feel like a job, and for so many it has. I hope this post helps others to take themselves back too.
You did a fantastic job Kim on your post!
Good for you Kim! I’m glad you aren’t going to give up your blog! I think everyone needs to enjoy their blogging, and when it becomes a chore, you need to step back and get back to what made it fun in the first place.
I think you have put into words just what many other bloggers are feeling right now. Well said.
Steph
Great post, Kim. I heard you on FNL and I hope you’re feeling better today! As a new “mommy-blogger” I hope I can have as much integrity as you do. xoox
This really hits home right now. I just finished a review that I’ve been stressing about. I have a backlog of them that sometimes cause me more stress that the excitement of the free products can replace.
I agree. It’s fun to get caught up in the blog world, write, “emote” but in the end, we all get a little overwhelmed with it if we don’t watch which direction we’re going in. Pulling back and enjoying your life rather than viewing it as your next blog post, searching for your next blog post in your life, is a good thing. Your family, you, will be happier for it.
I look forward to reading the relaxed mommy version! (Not that this version is bad….)