One thing I have always been adamant with Charlotte about is stranger danger. Having a little girl (or really a little boy too!) puts you on edge pretty much every time your child is out in a public place. And it doesn’t matter if you are with them, it’s some constant fear that the boogie man is going to sweep and steal your child to a life of slavery or murder them.
Sadly most people are probably good in this world but we have to operate on the fear that the minute you turn your head things could go very wrong.
But even with what we teach our kids, and trust me, every day my child leaves the house she gets a new lecture on running, kicking, biting, that an adult asking for help from a child to find a puppy is a killer and about 100 other things I can think of (yes, I do this EVERY morning), how much of the stranger danger rules do we follow as adults?
This morning while surfing through Facebook, Julie from Coupon Saving Family wrote:
Wow. WOW.
Can you imagine if she had opened her door? The what if?
I know that I have a house alarm that is constantly set, I have a panic button also that calls the police and the alarm company over the intercom, but to be honest, if someone was outside my door upset and frantic that they needed help, chances are I would open the door. It’s my better nature. You can bet thanks to Julies reminder today that I would put my entire family at risk by acting on an instinct to help. And since I teach my daughter to not open the door to strangers, and she doesn’t, I would be violating everything I am trying so hard to instill.
This blog post is to serve as a reminder sometime that we as adults so often forget.
We can teach responsibility, but without practicing what we preach, the battle is only half won.
~trisha
*julie gave me permission to share her status
It really sucks that the world has come to this. It sucks that when someone is REALLY in danger or dying we actually have to make a decision. Do we want to choose to help people out? Or do we do nothing because we are too afraid of potentially risking our own life. There shouldn’t HAVE to be a decision. It should be automatic instinct for us to help people. And it’s not anymore. So sad. I am at fault. There have been times were I didn’t stop to help the person on the side of the road. Days were I have not answered the door to a face I didn’t know. There have been times I have not given money to the homeless man on the street (Not because I didn’t want to. My fiancee was with me and in a particularly stingy mood and was not into giving away our money or else I totally would have stopped.). I am tired of being afraid of the what if. What if I might get hurt, raped, kidnapped, mugged? KILLED? Why is it okay to know that someone else is hurting or dying and we justify not doing anything by telling ourselves, “It’s fine. They will be okay. Someone else will help them. I don’t wanna risk getting hurt.”. Why is that ok? Are people really fine with letting someone else suffer…to save their own lives?
Ehhhh….sorry for the rant. I guess this is a touchy subject for me. I didn’t even realize it until now.
I do need to add that of course I consider the lives of my kids when I am in situations were they might get hurt. I do not want anything to happen to me…or them. I don’t want to them to loose me.
How scary. I think most of us would open the door, thinking that they must really need help. Sad that we have to be reminded that these are not always their intentions.
What an interesting post. In the UK recently we have had a high profile abduction case all over the news and it has really made a lot of parents question the way that we handle stranger danger with our kids. But I think you’re right- we also have to question the way that we, as adults, deal with it too.
x
That is so scary! I saw a ” I survived” episode once where the mother was taking a shower and her toddler opened the front door to a man knocking on the door…he raped her repeatedly over the course of a 48 hour period until she was finally able to escape. I have always taught my daughter to never open the door unless it was a family member!
I would have probably opened the door as well. I read this to my husband and family.
So glad she was smart about it. How absolutely scary! I dont ever think about it either.
A woman was nearly killed near here when she opened the door to a man dressed as a delivery person. It’s completely freaked me out. Who doesn’t open their door when they see the uniform?!?
I have a camera that used to be trained on the front door that I removed to do a software upgrade on and never got around to putting back. As soon as I heard her story it went back up. Sadly, delivery companies are using contracted employees now so they show up in their personal cars. It’s made it harder…so now I don’t answer and hope they’ll leave the package and go. If they needed a signature to deliver it, oh well, it’s worth driving to pick it up.
I’m hearing more and more about this type of crime from friends in the Denver area. I told the kids they are only allowed to open the door for UPS or FedEx (they can see the truck in the driveway) or for a neighbor. Everyone else they need to tell them to wait as they need to get their mom, etc. Even so, my daughter answered the door and left it wide open while she got me. Luckily it was only a survey person, but still. I gave her the big lecture after and told both kids not to ever do that again. Cripes!
Wow is all I can say. There is no telling what those people were going to do to her. I just learned a lesson and thank God not from experience.
Oh my, that is really scary! I’m not sure what I would have done. I probably would have opened the door without thinking it through like Julie did! I am definitely going to start questioning myself when I open the door, I already tell the kids not to, why am I not listening to my own advice? Thank you for the reminder to practice what we preach!
Thank you for this safety reminder. How scary.
I have to say that I am guilty as charged in opening the door. Last winter, on one of the coldest nights we had in Florida, my doorbell rang at 2am. I have insomnia, my husband happened to be up as well. I answered the door (we live in a quiet neighborhood.)
The guy said someone was chasing him, but he wasn’t out of breath. He was looking around, nervous and antsy-my storm door locked. “Can I come in?” My answer was no. He was in a pair of jeans and nothing else on a night where our temperatures were in the teens, but he didn’t even seem to be affected.
I didn’t see or hear anything, told him I’d have a patrol car come out, called the police and he paced my walkway, then wandered off. The cops showed up-apparently, about a half mile down the road, there’s a trailer that is a known meth lab and they think he’d wandered off from there. Sure enough, that was it.
I don’t answer the door anymore!
Wow, just wow! I read an article the other day about a lady that was expecting a package and opened the door to a ‘delivery’ guy and he stabbed her and duct taped her to a chair. So scary!
Very recently, a woman around here was brutally beaten and robbed because of a man posing as a delivery person. She opened the door and he barged in. I always look out my window before I open my front door. Sometimes I just shake my head and say no, then drop the curtain.
Thank goodness this woman was smart and didn’t open the door! Sometimes, people really suck.
Oh my goodness! Not that long ago, we were woken at 4am by our doorbell. At that hour, you ‘assume’ someone is in need of help and open the door. We did. The thought of this happening never even entered our mind. Why? Why would someone do this? Thank you for the reminder.
That is scary. Now I feel like less of a freak for NEVER EVER answering my door. Anyone that has permission to come in my home already has a key.
Cat same here!! Me or the kids ever answer the door. Everyone thinks I am nuts but if I am not expecting someone you better believe you wont get in my house! They better call first haha!
Creeeepy! :-/ So glad she didn’t open the door! I hate that we have to live with that kind of fear and caution, though.
That is so super scary!!!