I admit it.
Sometimes I get lost.
I knew once I had Charlotte I would be a stay at home mom. That was pretty much secured after spending the better part of maternity leave wishing it would never end. I was sold. This was my girl and she was gonna be my full time job.
And thus we faced the world together; navigating the road of mother and daughter.
Balancing being a wife.
And I admit, sometimes I got lost.
Now I am the type of person that is completely content with being alone. I am content in silence, reveal in nothing more then a bath and a good book. I need zero friends but the one I married. In fact, in many ways, I prefer the basics. I have no one to answer to, no one to offend, no one to turn down if I really don’t want to go shopping or to a movie. I have been this way my entire life. Most women cannot handle my very matter of fact, direct, and often masculine attitude.
At 31 years old, I can admit I wont be changing- nor do I care to.
People who want me to can get lost.
Then the internet came. The internet gave me something to impress my energy on.
I could follow people in silence or conversation.
I could cry or I could laugh.
I could yell or I could whisper.
But sometimes my voice got lost.
My platform is just that; a platform. I love the challenge, the fresh smell of a new template, the thrill of breaking a statistic or getting a pat on the back. The out of the blue email from a stranger. Its a huge world out there and my little minuscule mark is important, even if its only important to one person.
Me.
But I still get lost.
I can forget that the world doesn’t stop if I don’t tweet at that moment, if a post doesn’t go up at that moment. If I cant make it to a class or a show or fix someones html at that moment. If I cant return my email at that moment.
Its so easy to get lost.
Its so easy to put off the mommy will yous…for one more minute.
That sometimes Charlotte seems lost.
But now, with my daughter and I separate in rooms, both of us typing away on our respective sites, I am not lost.
I am going to go take her hand so we can go be found…together.
~Trisha
Great post Trish!
Sigh. I could have written this myself.
I feel the same way. I really don’t enjoy people all that much! I love my husband and kids but have very few friends irl. I find myself dreading going out sometimes. Yep, the internet is great.
Great post! Love this so much!!!
Great Post Trisha as always. I feel the same way, my blog is doing great and now I’m bored I have been thinking of opening a forum but I’m not sure yet ! I need to think about it more.
You know this post is so awesome (just like you are) and while I read this it’s like I read about myself. I’m the same way, I don’t need anyone other than my daughter and my husband, and my online friends .
Great post Trisha! We are alike in some ways, but I can’t stand being alone. I love having my children and husband around. I could care less about friends. I have everything I need at home.
You know this post is so awesome (just like you are) and while I read this it’s like I read about myself. I’m the same way, I don’t need anyone other than my daughter and my husband, and my online friends
Lovely post, Trish. I don’t comment on your site often because there are lots of folks patting you on the back and I figured my pat wouldn’t make a difference. BUT I absolutely had to give you props for this one. Way to go in finding yourself, finding your voice. Thanks for sharing.
Love this post Trish. We have alot in common. I too spend my life alone with my children and significant other. I love being alone for the most part, and when I want a little company I hop on the internet.
I’m not a total recluse, I do meet a few girlfriends for dinner or a week-end get away occassionally. I have found that the less people that I’m around the more peace I have.
Besides my significant other, my daughter is my BFF. I’ll hold her hand forever.
Can totally relate!
Gosh Trisha what a BEAUTIFUL post. You are so good with your words!
beautiful.