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Moms are possibly the most brilliant and evil creatures on the face of the planet. The minute a child comes sliding out of our vagina’s, we turn into a bossy, my way is right, and your way sucks opinionator.

Unless you were like that before, then kudos to you.

But I’m specifically talking about the major debates that are prevalent in the 1000s of generated discussions online. Breast feeding or Not , preschool or not, circumcision or not..all clearly personal decisions that can only be dictated by your truth and experiences.

For isn’t it true that what we are living is the right way no matter which way it is? Think about it. Its deep.

I can guarantee to you that I will never care if you decide to whip your boob out for 2 years or 2 weeks, or if you choose to lop some skin off your childs penis. I certainly would never be passionate enough about it to dictate that you are wrong.

However, my absolutely favorite argument that goes on is Stay at Home Mom versus Working Mom. Its the “mother” of all fights. The one that gets everyone hot under the collar and what internet dreams are made of. If you are a traffic monger, nothing is going to send you more trolls and traffic then making an inflammatory, accusatory statement on your beliefs with this subject.

I used to know a girl that firmly believed if you were a working mom, you were pretty much the scum of the earth. It horrified her so much that just talking to someone that worked out of the home was as bad as shaking hands with a person with open sores on their hand and a sign around their neck that said “I have AIDS”.

She believed that a moms only duty was to be home, to cook, and probably to bend over 6 out of 7 days a week for her husband.

I am sure in pearls and an apron.

On the flip side, I have known moms that work by choice. Oh, horror of horrors to some.  They drop their kids off at daycare and with a jump, hop, and a skip, head off to work and swear that their kids are gaining a valuable education and learning responsibility from watching parents earn outside the home, not to mention the social skills of interaction.

Let me tell you why these arguments piss me off.

Everyone leaves out ME.

I am work at home parent.

Some say..that is the best of both worlds! Oh, sure, and the WORST.  The grass isn’t always greener, sometimes its blue, or pink, or has cat throw up on your last order sheet. You haven’t lived till your office doors are closed and you see the faces of your daughter and husband peering in at you through the window pane asking you to “stay home from work today”.

And other mothers, they don’t understand. Both sides of the spectrum look down on you. I fit in no where.  I get cross-eyed glazed over blank faces if I try to explain my days. I can’t nod my head in agreement with the stay at home mom that spends her days wiping butts and baking cakes. I cant even remember to set a timer most days and its all I can do to not burn the house down before my insurance forgets about the last time I burned my house down.

I have no lunch dates. No bonus check. No Christmas parties. No meetings.

I wear jogging pants to work, not suits.

I am the shipper, the marketer, the website designer, the customer service agent, the product developer, the assembler…I am also the mom, the lunch maker, the nap putter-downer, the sippy cup getter, the barbie player, the bath time maker, the clean the kitchener, and the switch the laundry-er.

In a world where moms create outcasts based on their choices, I am the ultimate misfit, because I fit in neither argument.

I can tell you that it makes me smile though. I am blessed that I am here when my daughter wants to read a book, or snuggle on the couch, I am the one that feels the success of a “job well done” email from a customer, and a kiss on the cheek from my husband as he passes through.

And while I cant always “call into work sick”, I can stumble downstairs in my PJs, skip the deodorant, put on some coffee (and baileys!) and catch up on Rock of Love while creating my domination of the world from my own office. I can even adjust the AC without needing a key or permission.

Somehow the worst of both worlds….just got better.

~Trisha

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